To her, the daughter of the mountains, with love!

The morning was fresh and beautiful with the sun peeping out of the clouds and the dew on top of the grass reflecting wonderful colors. He was walking along the footpath to get an auto and go to one of those beautiful catholic churches in God's own country. The autos were the old 80s style. They caught his attention. Much of the place had a serene rural outlook and it looked strikingly similar to those pictures he saw in the museums. The ones from the colonial era. He had always been a victim of those lovely magic potions that Kerala has to offer. The lovely weather, the beautiful backwaters and the stunning girls with their hair flowing free, fresh from the head bath.

Ernakulam is a small town, seen as a part of the larger Cochin, though like most twin cities, there isn't a border or line to separate their facades. It is all in a wonderful blend. The long corridor in the church had an air of peacefulness in it when he entered it for the first time. Many groups of people had gathered and they were chatting incessantly. He was a secret admirer of malayalam and those nasal sounds of chatter acted like magnet to him as he could understand some parts from those discussions. Towards the end of that long corridor stood a girl, who had come in with her parents and the three of them were eagerly looking at a lone lily that stood with all class and charm in the middle of a small artificial pond besides the passage. There was nothing more beautiful than the white lily and the school of fish that swam in the mini pond. But as he moved closer to that small congregation of three, it was not the lily that caught his eye, It was the girl who was admiring the lily. He stood like a statue for a passing moment, stunned by her appearance. The straight, dark hair flowing flamboyantly over her shoulders. Her charismatic eyes. Her mesmerizing lips were a thing of beauty. He felt an unprecedented joy when she suddenly gazed back at him, though only for a fleeting instant. At the moment, he was witnessing one of the most beautiful sights that have ever unfolded in front of him..all his life.

It was barely minutes before the congregation reduced in size from three to one and she was waving her hand at the departing couple. Her parents would come back to pick her up late in the afternoon. She stopped waving as they disappeared and noticed him as he briskly walked past her, back and forth. He never knew the art of breaking wonderful silences and even now it was the girl who just uttered something. He didn't believe what was happening around for an instant and blame the shock for his inability to comprehend those sweet set of syllables in malayalam. He paused to check if it was all real and to his joy, it really was. He said he couldn't speak malayalam and she quickly shifted to English. Conversation kicked in and they spoke animatedly for a few minutes. In the process, he lost himself completely amidst the sea of her charm.

The beautiful morning gave way to a humid afternoon as the function at the church went on without much attention to this romantic sonnet. The only activity he was engaged in was a series of stares at this new apple of his eye. A few of them noticed and many of them unnoticed. Einstein once said "Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute." And the words were so true to their meaning and in no time he was staring at the prospect of leaving the church when the function was over. Her parents were there again to take her back to the small town that she hailed from, a few miles south of Alapuzha.

He couldn't gather anything besides her name in the few minutes of conversation he had with her in the morning and as he saw her getting ready to move, he experienced a gush of blood flowing into his heart. He felt a need for some chivalry and courage at that moment though those aforementioned traits were very uncharacteristic of him. He took a credit card bill from his wallet and tore a small part from one of the rectangular edges. He was groping for words to write on that piece of pulp when his fingers jumped the gun without his cognizance. He looked down to see that he had already written his number and name on one side. The Adam in him wasn't that big a poet like Keats or Wordsworth. But he managed to write half a sentence on the rear side of the paper- "If you think we should be in touch...."

He slipped it under her cute pink bag that lay on a nearby table and started walking back home in quick strides as the function was over and the gathering had already dispersed. He didn't have the courage to look back but his heart started beating faster and faster as he made his way out of the church. He was wondering if she would see the note and pick it up. But he was afraid if it was too small and would go unnoticed. He slandered in whispers for not doing the act a bit more vividly. But the moment had gone and he couldn't get back anyway. He reached home and sat back in the reclining piece of furniture gazing at the fancy chandelier that hung from the ceiling. Minutes felt like hours and the ashtray slowly filled to its brim. But the beep from his mobile that he was so dearly yearning for didn't seem to appear. He woke up from the idyll that was going through his mind as his phone beeped about an hour later and for an instant he had his heart in his mouth. Words fail me as I try to describe his emotions at that moment. But the words on his mobile screen read "Hi. I picked up the note. Didn't expect one there though. How's the day? - " His joy knew no bounds and his fingers floundered as he drafted his reply. He was trying to speak his heart by way of the text message and as he was groping for poetic phrases, he heard yet another beep. But it was not from his phone this time. It was the sound of his alarm clock. He opened his eyes and surprisingly, found his mom with a cup of coffee standing beside his bed indicating something with her finger pointed at the clock. The clock read 14 10 hours. But he was looking at it upside down. So it was 7 40 am and it was time for him to wake up.

P.S : Apologies for the abrupt ending and a badly crafted anticlimax. But sometimes truth is bitter as the old adage goes and it is better hidden than confessed at large.

Not there yet, Try Again

It was not the first time,
That the thing was close to reach.
The wind pilfered that valuable possession from the trembling hands of mine.
Life, by and large, holds many a lesson, and offers to teach.


Strewn on the path of this journey called 'Life'.
Are the flowers that meet your eye from the face of mother earth.
Wise are those who spot the ones that are fresh among the rife.
But they are aplenty, there is no dearth.


Pick the ones that come your way and keep the stride going,
Never give up if the flowers meant for you are not fragrant.
There are many more for you, waiting.
Try, try, try, because Thee rewards he who is diligent.

Monk! I need a Monk!

Well, I've lost almost all of the motivation I had under my tray in this big ordeal called life. I mean, I am not that drugs kinda person. So I have nothing too specific to attribute this one to. I have been riding with this level of motivation (or lack thereof) for about a month and a bit longer now. I am part of the many crazy people on earth who love their cars. Old or New. To add to what I have been going through in the recent past, I ran into a mind block this morning when I drove my car alongside the apartment gate and bought myself a rather nasty scratch on its nice and glittery red clothing. Like the way J.D.Salinger puts it in his epic novel, I think I'd rather have a Goddamn Horse instead of this one.

The feeling of nihilism is one that is a superlative of what I am currently going through. I know it is not that bad with me. I did try out a couple of those traditional approaches of getting over these mind blocks. Once I came out of it like I never cared about anything in life. I thought there wasn't much to worry about in terms of job, love, money et. al. But then, these things grow upon you. Even a slight-ish impact on your state of mind like the one I had this morning is good enough to add salt to the wound. The  picture of those long white marks keep flashing in my mind ever since and I am not able to get out of it.

These phases in one's life, by and large, tend to make one lose hope on oneself. You can go out under the sun and start dancing to your favorite tune or sit down on a couch at the bar and sip your favorite whisky with soda. But it doesn't work like any sort of magic. I've tried drinking 2 cups of tea each time I go to the corner store. I've tried losing my mind to some lengthy hours of cleaning ordeals around the house. I've even tried to go out to the beach to untangle my mind from what is currently holding it. I know these things aren't going to give any motivation to fill the void that I am referring to. But I expected them to get my mind out of the logjam. In vain.

Socializing/Finding someone to love have been agreed upon as good options out of these nasty situations. But in my case they aren't helping either. I kind of have a screen in front of my facade that filters the good energy out of what touches upon me in day to day life. It is not about the career/job. It is not about the lack of love. It is about something else that I am trying to figure out. I always believed the culprit in my case was, more often than not, the idle time that has filled most of my agenda sheet in the last months. But trying to keep me engrossed in conversations didn't help either. So I am ruling that out of question too. One intriguing thing that is probably still inscrutable to me is the fact that in this period, markedly, I had a number of unrelated and random dreams. Different and more in number than usual. I think it comes down to saying that the mind is preoccupied with something else and is not able to negotiate with its subconscious brother.

The emotional snapshots that these dreams give me are probably arising out of a good number of unanswered questions in the mind that the subconscious of mine is not able to handle. These blocks have been a burden for quite some time for me. And they've more or less made me retire from a few things that I used to keep myself busy with in life. I am totally idle. I think I need some food for my brain, mind and body.

Do I really know what I need in life?

This is a thought that has been spinning my head for quite some time now. Me and my close circle of friends (read: my girl friend) discuss a lot over this topic and have been cribbing over how we want to change the typical IT lifestyle that we currently have. We have clearly realized that our goals in life are quite far from what we are doing right now. As in most cases of human predicaments, we talk a lot about it but haven't been able to get a concrete step taken in the right direction.

Let's consider my daily schedule. My Monday starts like a scene from the movie rush hour, where i realize that I have a stupid meeting to attend at 10 AM (wee hours of Monday I would call that) and this aforementioned realization usually happens around the time frame of 9:25 AM or so. After making it to the meeting at least 10 minutes late, I extend my nap in the conference room only to be awakened by periodic gurgles from the organizer sitting next to me. After a lot of deliberation and almost nil participation, I get out of the room for a cup of tea to stimulate my grey matter. The day goes by with a couple of fights with the disastrously slow computer which is my lone companion for the day. After a few hours of #including and ClassA-extends-ClassB-ing, I get out of the shit hole like a tired pugilist who has fought 5 rounds only to lose it all during the final stages. It would be like deceiving my readers if I said the time of the day when my exit from office happens marks the end of the day. To put facts straight i should rephrase that sentence to read "End of the Night".

If weekdays are so boring and pass me like a turbulent storm, weekends are worse. I get up fairly early in the morning(read: 11 am) and spend a substantial amount of time thinking what I should do over the weekend. With that thought doing all the calculations in my mind, the clock decides to tick something like 1 pm or 2 pm and there's a call from my gastro-intestinal tract to save it from dying of hunger. After dealing with things and managing to call off that hunger strike, English Premier League/Indian Premier League or some such league demands an attendance and I sit glued to my TV set for what I think is close to 2 or 3 hours. But in fact, the time I would have spent on that ordeal is much more.... which in turn means that it is time for the next meal so as to avoid another turbulent attack from my digestive faculties. With a ditto repeat of the same itinerary on Sunday, I face the rocket-speed-weekend-that's-close-to-an-end phenomenon. With nothing much that can be done about it, I go back to bed ruing my 2 wasteful days only to wake up for a repeat telecast in the next week.

I am not any soothsayer or fortune predictor. But I am pretty confident that most IT folks are stuck with the same/similar kind of schedule in their daily life.

On one such Sunday, that has been well described above, I happened to read a book by Paulo Coelho where he talks about what one does in life and how a winner is determined by the essence of his presence (excuse me for the rhyme) in this universe. I wake up the next morning to welcome another dreadful Monday and I realize that one thing has changed. I wake up a completely new man and realize i have a drastic change in attitude and outlook. That situation demands some explanation. I agree. Here it goes. The change that has been mentioned above is that I start to think "If I really know what I need in life". I know that is not a change per se. But as our experienced ancestors have repeatedly said, thoughts lead to actions and all that sort of a thing, It is always a good sign in the right direction if we start thinking about challenging the status quo that rules over us. But that thought took me nowhere which is an unfortunate thing and I ended up understanding the fact that I just simply exist in this world and occupy a corner of it like other stones, rocks and trees do.Period. I am sure a good number of IT folks who have managed to make it to this point of the long and boring passage will resonate on the same plane apropos the thoughts I have shared.

But the sad part is I am looking for someone to show me the way to correct this awfully boring lifestyle and I have not met anyone who can show some light at the end of the tunnel in that respect. Any thoughts?

P.S: Ok I have been tortured by an abysmal young blot who wants a mention in this post. Where I said: "I have not met anyone who can show some light at the end of the tunnel", I should have said "I have met someone(This Idiot) who could not show any light at the end of any tunnel even after hours and hours of gyan and free advice he gave me."

If Only

If only we knew
That we are sent here only to view

If only we understood
That the world here is contrived

If only we realized
That love was the only thing real and unfeigned

If only we learnt
That nothing was ours when sent

If only we recognized
That nothing comes with us when we are cauterized

If only we were not men
And were sent down not to make any sin

If only we didn't create
Those that backfired and made us prostrate

If only we stopped
Hoarding money that is after all man-made

If only we thought
Life was more than what we have got

If only we were loved
If only we were to love
If only we were surreal
If only we were to live a dream
If only we were to exist and do nothing more
If one we didn't create the world we live in

We would not have been part of Mankind
We would not be part of the rat race

We would have realized that what cometh goeth the way it is destined
And we are mere actors who perform on stage
And we were no better than any other beast
And we are not the creators
Nor the destroyers

Life would have been a lot better

Enjoy Maadi

I have been cribbing for quite sometime about life at Hyderabad not being too eventful and i have contrived to a decision that if one has to enjoy life and spend money, one has to work in Bangalore.

Reasons:

1. Most/All of your friends invariably work in Bangalore.
2. You have numerous malls and weekends can't get better with the 'bird-watching opportunity' one always gets at these hangouts.
3. Since almost all of your college chums sit here, there is no scarcity of gossip.
4. You start biking like crazy for otherwise commuting is usually tough on weekdays.
5. Your virtues get better as you need to exercise a lot of patience owing to traffic.
6. You will not find any difficulties in knowing Bangalore's geography as it is almost a straight line on the map.
7. If you are a 'tamilian' you tend to feel at home for the language is spoken almost at every street corner.
8. Most/All high paying jobs are available in the city for almost every Indian company has a branch here.
9. You become immune to most/all air-borne diseases as the normal amount of Carbon Monoxide you inhale is awfully high and it overrides or suppresses other problems.
10. You can travel to any of the other three South Indian states by an overnight's journey.

If you are a Southie, Bangalore is 'the' place to be in.

P.S: Can somebody who has read this post find me a job at Bangalore? (Lol)

Downtown Tadipatri !!!!~!!!!

The merits and demerits of the "Life at the Country Side" is an age-old topic and i have come to discuss the same in this space. And here I am, back from a first-hand country side Experience. This post is dedicated to my visit to a small township on a hillock near downtown "Tadipatri" where i spent my blissful weekend. Tadipatri is a small town located en route to Chennai from Hyderabad and it is worth mentioning that it boasts of UltraTech's largest Cement Plant in Asia.

To start with, i concede to the fact that "Life downtown" is always a better bet than the one which involves the hustles and the hullabaloo of the metro. As part of the "clan" at college which threw tantrums at villages and village dwellers from down south, I have been actively involved in mocking at the way civilizations have, by far, neglected those people, who we are at this point, debating about.

My weekend involved a really splendid outing to my best friend's sweet home near Tadipatri. Nature was at its best and the gated community had loads to offer when I did my first sightseeing around the township on Saturday. The greenery and the peaceful community that inhabited this township, was so new to me for I have more or less grown up in a city, brought up with all the mall culture and other typical metro offerings.

I would like to introduce the four characters in this post who would be henceforth referred to as "Sir TPJ"(Daddy), "Rchie"(Sissy), "Chota Don"(Friend) and "Aunt Bliss"(Mommy). To talk of Sir TPJ, it would be a gross understatement if i just say he is a revered gentleman who commands a respectable position at this Township which nurtures a group of little over 1000 people from various parts of the country. Aunt Bliss is a wonderful cook and she loves cooking " elaborate four course meals" "three times a day". Fresh vegetables for lunch and dinner came from nearby gardens and the delicacies straight from Aunt Bliss' kitchen are worth mentioning. Rchie is the sweet sis who is currently enjoying her summer holidays back home and Chota Don is waiting to join college for his post graduate studies.

The wonderful weekend involved the fantastic walk down the park, delicious food served at regular intervals throughout the day, Malayalam movie on Asianet, UNO Card games, badminton outing, late night wodehouse humor, hot career discussions, dinner time family chit chats, Channel V Music hits, evening time lychee treats, endless football story times and lastly, the marathon Wimbledon final to finish it off. That final was one of the best tennis matches that i have been witness to, till date. A-Rod was at his career best only to lose out to the damned luck (courtesy: Fedex's "Black Magic") at the end of the day. The 5 hour finale bade good bye to me along with this cute family of four who took up the task of entertaining me for the weekend. Needless to say they did a fantastic job out of it and i would fail miserably if i miss out on mentioning the elegant Urbana "Tie and Handkerchief set" which was my parting gift.

This post is purely a tribute to the place and people that made my weekend downtown so remarkable. When it all turns nostalgic later one day, and i go back to turn the pages of my life fervently, these two pages would without doubt be a "highlighted couple" that would keep me entrenched in emotions for ages to come.

P.S: Uploaded a few snaps

SouthFull

It was a windy sunday evening. I woke up from my afternoon nap, which is becoming kind of a ritual during weekends of late. A mini sandstorm had just passed by. The weather was really awesome. A perfect one for a romantic walk or something along the seashore. I streched myself and got out of bed to get the picturesque bird's eye view of the IT park nearby, from my third floor apartment. It was gratifying. I walked out to get some cool breeze coz it was one rare evening in the month of march when the temparatures usually start to soar. I walked towards the tea shop with my room mates for a cup of 'chai'-customary on a sunday evening. As I walked past the narrow lanes with the low walls that helped many couples on lazy weekends, I started to feel as if I was walking through lush green fields, enjoying the scented fresh air. I got lost in thoughts as my mind wandered. The picture of the green fields in my mind slowly made me feel nostalgic. I wondered about those small vacations to less known villages in south tamil nadu about a decade back. The village atmosphere has always interested me a lot since childhood. I was excited by the freshness in the air coz these valleys have really low pollution levels

Having spent the most part of my school life in Chennai, I have always had a liking for the serene and calm valleys in the southern countryside. I have a bucket list of things to do before i die and the first in the list is to live a year or two in a hill station running a small shop for daily bread. That sounds pretty weird for the detailing of the occupation and stuff in those couple of years. Looking up into the black sky and wondering how many stars there are in the universe, from a hill top--an out of the world feeling I would say. The most attractive thing about a hill is the fact that you see the most beautiful creations of mother nature below you--I mean, the altitude. It gives you a feel. I am running out of words to explain the beauty of it.

Avoiding the hustle and bustle of city life, one really gets to experience paradise on earth. The other thing about small towns of the south that interests me is the annual festival that happens as a custom. It is known as 'thiruvizha' in tamil and it would be a once-in-a-lifetime-experience for a city dweller. Crowds thronging the narrow street that has those exhibition stalls and the legendary eat outs-Absolutely amazing. The event is a chance for people from nearby towns and villages to spend a lazy weekend evening with their spouse and children. I have been to a couple of these melas during my earlier summer vacations. And both the times there was this light drizzle early in the evening that makes the climate really enjoyable. One can embark on a new chapter of life in these towns located on the hills and the nearby valleys. It instills a feel of romance. The ice cold fresh waterfalls in these hills have made me dumbstruck many a time. These places are fraught with the complete beauty of mother nature. I got immersed in the thoughts of the life in such places which are known to have very low population densities.

I sprang back into reality when my friend patted from behind to tell me that i had walked past the tea stall. The weather was pleasent yet. I had my regular cup of 'chai' and walked back to catch up with the weekend premier league football. It was the early kick off that i wanted to watch that day. I wanted to think a lot more about those but i ended up watching the lunch time football with the usual packet of potato chips and my mug of beer.

Random Tag

Here is the 25 things about me post!!..I just learnt from a couple of pals that one of the few inital posts ought to be this. Random things about you. I dont know if i can pen down 25. Will try to make a decent number atleast.

1. Firstly i have something close to "brain fog". Dont google it now to see what it is. It might give fearful results. Just that i dont remember things too well.

2. I trust in very few people in life and they ve been there with me since long. One of them is of course my brother who seems to understand me better than anyone else in this world. The other few are a couple of my close friends.

3. I eat anything served (but vegetarian). This habit of mine has come to me recently after a series of events in my hostel mess over my 5 yrs at college.

4. I remember a few things very keenly in life. They are a selected few which seem to interest me. But i emphasize on the "few" here.

5. There are two priorities in my life- My career and my family. Nothing other than these two are of serious importance to me.

6.I believe in Charles Darwin's theory of Survival of the fittest. I am good at adapting to the surroundings andd changing myself to adjust to the milieu.

7. Getting high is one of the irresistable things in life.

8. There are five things i love..Special mention these 5 things require-because i get into a different frame of mind wheni have a majority of these with me at a given particular time.- "Manchester United", "Funky techie cell phone", "my bike", "internet" and "cricket".

9. I love Manchester United-Hardcore.

10. ARR, Ilayaraja, Creed, Switchfoot, U2 and Pink floyd make up for almost 90 percent of the music i listen to.

11.I get angry kinda frequently but only with people who mean a lot to me.An assumption which makes me feel that these people are ok to mess up with. After all they ll be back with you kinds.

12. I can control the hours of my sleep. I am neither hypersomniac nor insomniac.

13. A trusworthy person is how my friends have judged me as yet.

14. I talk to myself more than i talk to others. I love solitude but not an excess of it. I can keep yumm yumming for hours. But there are certain topics which i prefer to discuss with myself.

15. I keep my time and expect people around me to do it either. But a far cry. Not many live up to it. In short i am punctual and a time freak.

16. I can sit idle for hours and hours and hours. It does nt disturb me.

17. I am too pragmatic at analysing situations.

18.I have a very different view of God. In short i believe God created something called evil.It did not start existing by itself... and i feel God makes man think.Man does nothing of his own.

19. I am over ambitious but i am over pessimistic too. So a plethora of confusions rule my thinking in general.

20. I select my friends and keep those which i think add meaning to my life.

21. I expect my best friends to live upto what i think of them.Because i value them a lot and they form an important part of the decision making process in my life.

22. I am afraid of rats since childhood. It is an allergy, a fear or whatever..i really don't know.

23. I am not a great liar. I get caught too easily. Disadvantageous many times.

24. I love the way Indian culture revolves around a number of values. I dont mean to say i am against westernization, but i prefer limitations to it.

25. I cant think about a thing for too long. Lack of concentration i should say...coz i took about 3 hrs to draft this page.

And i would tag somebody for sure to do this bugging task of thinking about oneself for so long.

Election Corner

India during election times is like no other place in the world.The whole look of a city changes. Banners are hung across every street. Posters are hung on every inch of space. Loudspeakers blare campaign slogans constantly. Every party holds huge rallies for their supporters and often distributes food or blankets to everyone who attends. Things have improved a lot in the last 10 years. The key to the change has been awareness. Everybody is very interested in the news, and they discuss political issues (and movie stars) constantly. When people are illiterate, often one person who can read will read the newspaper out loud to a group and then they discuss the issues. Every newspaper, even in rural areas, contains a lot of news about the rest of the world, not just local news. The most important factor that helps awareness, of course, is the television. In our state, Tamil Nadu, for example, the government ordered that every village must have at least one television. People in these rural villages can watch programs in their own regional languages. Political parties know how important television is, and most have created their own cable TV stations. All said and done, most difficult aspect of democracy in India is the caste system. The caste system is a ranking of traditional, hereditary levels in society that have determined a person’s occupation and role in Hindu society for thousands of years. Caste system has reined the vote bank these days.

For the first time I have decided to come forward and cast my vote in this year's general elections. It is high time we realized how caste based votes and winners who emerge out of it are changing the way democracy is viewed in the Indian perspective. We were one of the earliest democracies. Today we are among the largest democracies. But corruption and the titular politicians of today are leading us in a wrong direction. One important step from the voter's side is to change the way these politicians get elected. People who understand the depth of corruption and the dirty political hand which rules this country are those who dont take the pains to go and exercise their fundamental right to vote. If a mass from this class of people come down to vote we can be sure of changin the way we decide our leaders. A more discernible way of voting will definitely change things.

Come forward to vote Young Man!!!!!!!