Wednesday, 21 July 2010

Pakistan's antisocial networking

As I draft this post, the number of common websites on the internet that have been forced to shutdown in Pakistan has touched double digit figures. Insanity on the part of bureaucrats in Pakistan has rocketed to such a level that "In the name of Allah", they've decided to ban these websites : Yahoo, MSN, Hotmail, Youtube, Google, Amazon, Bing, Facebook, Twitter, In the name of Allah and Islam Exposed. Some of the above websites do have derogatory content and are sure to hurt muslim sentiments undoubtedly. But Google, Yahoo, Bing, Amazon.....I cannot convince myself as to how they would have conjured up reasons for blocking them.

In general, human IQ is not even comparable with that of many other varieties of fauna on earth. It is quintessential for any brain to tell a cat from a dog or a hen from a donkey or some such obvious thing to qualify for human standards. Going by that argument, I can't find human brains in the failed  state of Pakistan. These things utterly make the issue insane. What these guys fail to understand is the fact that by banning these websites, they just make people more curious. It is like adding fuel to the fire. That observation is well supported from the fact that Pakistan tops the list in the number of porn or porn-related searches on the internet everyday. For people who haven't come to realize that porn is a contraband thingy, please be aware: Porn as such is banned in many countries around and yea, in Pakistan too.

There cannot be an internet session where one does not use Google search or one of Google's other numerous products. Google is so synonymous to the internet that the phrase "banning Google" can be equated to the phrase "banning Internet". Such policing-of-the-internet stuff has already been proved as a failure in countries with like-(no)-brains such as Saudi Arabia. On a philosophical note and in a generalized sense, "Any idea will have takers and naysayers". So from that point of view, Internet, being such a huge place, it is truly blasphemous to block a search engine on the grounds that it returns search results on derogatory content. Before we come to debate about the derogatory content, lets think about what Google could have done about this thing. A search engine will function as it should. If you don't like it, don't search. Simple. Banning the site?Blasphemous. And back to the content part, what could Bush do when the internet was replete with videos and articles like this, this and this? Answer: Nothing!.

I am not any expert on Islamic studies or anything of a religious sort, but for basics, I know one of the tenets of Islam is about tolerance and patience. These guys do not understand their own religion even as much as I do. What's more intriguing is: I noticed one chap who supports the decision saying:

"Good news, Google is just an Spy agency who work in favor of the CIA. as well as Yahoo and other shit american websites who trying to damage Islam image.

Down with America"

It gets even better, another guy says banning search engines like Google, Bing, Yahoo per se - is a very good decision but he wants the legislators to give him "an alternate way" to search the internet. Lol! I wonder if entrepreneurs will sense an opportunity here. Anyone up for a start up in the search engine domain?? ROTFLMAO.

I am not able to comprehend that. Some one help me here. I think Pakistan is caught in some time warp and are yet to be welcomed into the 21st century.

P.S: I could not resist the temptation of putting the picture of THIS hairstyle here as pointed out by Vijay.

Wednesday, 7 July 2010

Calling for an extradition: Joel Stein

Joel Stein of TIME Magazine is who I am referring to in the title. For people who are caught unawares at this point, News channels are full of him at this moment. So switch on and check that out. For more accessibility, one can also click on this link and see what Joel Stein had to say about Indians at New Jersey in his latest column for TIME.

Firstly, Stein's attempt at a "hilarious" column has not been taken very peacefully by many Indians in America and outside. Coincidentally since his article revolves around 'Edison' in New Jersey, Kal Penn, an Indian-American actor decided to call his article as 'unique and groundbreaking' as Alva Edison himself. Now that observation was a one in a hundred (Noothla oru vartha in Tamil). Stein talks about Multiple Gods with multiple arms and elephant faces and says he did not have any racist intention. Multiple laughs and Multiple applauses please. Sigh!. Indian brains/heads were laughably characterized as "dot heads" and Stein, in his apology (that followed an outburst in the media) says he didn't mean to deride Indians. Now I really wonder if Stein had all of his sense in working condition when he wrote those shameful lines on that column and I wonder if he was in his senses at all when he tried to defend himself in the apology. I would advise Mr. Stein to visit downtown San Francisco and see the white drug addicts on the roads (his fellow American citizens) before calling immigrants 'dumb cousins'.  Half of America is dumb and that argument holds good for any nation. Not everybody can be 'not-dumb'.Infact, most of the Indian Americans in the current context are clearly part of a creamy layer from the country. This opinion is well supported by a recent surge in the positions of power that Indians hold in and outside the government of the United States.

The attempt as it has been labeled is definitely an attempt at humour and I would expect we guys take it in its hilarious sense rather than calling names at him. But targetting one immigrant occupied town and its people is a little bizarre for such a faous national magazine. I get reminded of a TIME magazine cover way back in 2006 with a gorgeous girl in dotted bindi. The cover page title was " Why the world's biggest democracy is the next great economic superpower." Anyway, there isn't much to talk about it sitting few thousands of miles away. Let us officially declare Stein as a "White" and deal the rest with him in person. Extradite him to India. We'll show you what the real, democratic and soon-to-be economic superpower India looks like.

Monday, 5 July 2010

Hyderabad ke chichore potte aur khubsoorath pottiyaa ..khuda hafiz !

For the den-(no)-zens of Hyderabad, the title means"Good bye to all the naughty boys and beautiful gals of Hyderabad"

It is difficult to love the city that you live in, a city that you roamed about for two years. But it is even more difficult to leave it. With just one week left for me in this beautiful city that introduced me into the professional world, the feelings are of a mixed kind. Though I haven't converted myself into a "Pukka Hyderavaadi laundey" (A perfect Hyderabaadi youngster) in the two years, to part ways is indeed becoming an emotional affair. I am on my way to Chennai for a new job and the feeling is good to be back at home full-fledged, after 6 long years. The downside of it is bidding goodbye to the best years of my bachelorhood. The two years after graduation have introduced me into a truly cosmopolitan lifestyle in this city which is indigenous in its own sense.

This week would be my last one in Hyderabad and I have a bucket list of things to do before I leave. I will miss all the 'maal' that the city provided me with as I am going to barren terrain on the "masth maal hai re" front. To mark my last weekend here, I did a few things from my to-do list, like the Cafe Nandini coffee and meetha paan. The icing on the cake was my best friend's visit on this last weekend. This guy made my day. I had the perfectly lazy agenda for his visit and we managed to do nothing but eat, sleep, drink and football.

I would definitely miss the Madhapur jalsas, New year highs, paradise biriyanis, chutneys lip-smackers, mana ammayilus (eligible Hyderabadi spinsters), late night masala chai, the completely useless traffic police (who have managed to milk only 230 rs. for my TN registration bike over one and half years of its usage. With TN police the number would have touched 4 digits long back.), north indian jinglis, telangana maniacs, rayalaseema warriors, colorful telugu movies, bramhanandam comedy tracks, rockview apartments, neela residency, babulal (owner sahib), Hyderabadi language, a concept called winter (Chennai does not have a season called winter), the number of audis, mercedes', BMW's, volkswagens that flood jubilee and banjara hills, a high sex ratio on the company roster (I am moving to a highly testosterone driven workplace at Chennai), Karachi bakery biscuits, road side chat bhandaars, double ka meetha (a speciality Hyderabadi dessert), tastey foods kothu barota, mutta veechu parotta, hot rotis home food, front seats on the share autos and a lot more. But the icing on the Hyderabad piece of my cake has been and will always be my wonderful time with him, him and him, my dearest room mates.

It is tough to bid khuda hafiz to the numerous friends that I have made here-at work and outside. My friends at work place who have shaped me into a professional and people outside who have given me company for all the typical bachelor matters.

But I am looking forward to many other new things in Chennai for I am going back after quite a long time. First day first shows for all tamil padams, Besant Nagar beach, ECR drives, paruppu, vatha kozhambu (Sambar variety made out of tamarind), melagu rasam, thair saadam, mom's love, radio mirchi, tamil kulavilakkus,Satyam cinemas, murugan idli shop, saravanaa bhawan, isaiaruvi (tamil music channel), sun music, adithya(tamil comedy channel), sirippoli(-do-), relatives, car driving, t nagar shopping, various kalyana sapadu menu items in brahmin marriages etc.

Nevertheless, It is time to say adios to a really beautiful city that I will never forget.

Aiderawaadi Bhai jaan, Milthao Yaaro!!!