Well, I've lost almost all of the motivation I had under my tray in this big ordeal called life. I mean, I am not that drugs kinda person. So I have nothing too specific to attribute this one to. I have been riding with this level of motivation (or lack thereof) for about a month and a bit longer now. I am part of the many crazy people on earth who love their cars. Old or New. To add to what I have been going through in the recent past, I ran into a mind block this morning when I drove my car alongside the apartment gate and bought myself a rather nasty scratch on its nice and glittery red clothing. Like the way J.D.Salinger puts it in his epic novel, I think I'd rather have a Goddamn Horse instead of this one.
The feeling of nihilism is one that is a superlative of what I am currently going through. I know it is not that bad with me. I did try out a couple of those traditional approaches of getting over these mind blocks. Once I came out of it like I never cared about anything in life. I thought there wasn't much to worry about in terms of job, love, money et. al. But then, these things grow upon you. Even a slight-ish impact on your state of mind like the one I had this morning is good enough to add salt to the wound. The picture of those long white marks keep flashing in my mind ever since and I am not able to get out of it.
These phases in one's life, by and large, tend to make one lose hope on oneself. You can go out under the sun and start dancing to your favorite tune or sit down on a couch at the bar and sip your favorite whisky with soda. But it doesn't work like any sort of magic. I've tried drinking 2 cups of tea each time I go to the corner store. I've tried losing my mind to some lengthy hours of cleaning ordeals around the house. I've even tried to go out to the beach to untangle my mind from what is currently holding it. I know these things aren't going to give any motivation to fill the void that I am referring to. But I expected them to get my mind out of the logjam. In vain.
Socializing/Finding someone to love have been agreed upon as good options out of these nasty situations. But in my case they aren't helping either. I kind of have a screen in front of my facade that filters the good energy out of what touches upon me in day to day life. It is not about the career/job. It is not about the lack of love. It is about something else that I am trying to figure out. I always believed the culprit in my case was, more often than not, the idle time that has filled most of my agenda sheet in the last months. But trying to keep me engrossed in conversations didn't help either. So I am ruling that out of question too. One intriguing thing that is probably still inscrutable to me is the fact that in this period, markedly, I had a number of unrelated and random dreams. Different and more in number than usual. I think it comes down to saying that the mind is preoccupied with something else and is not able to negotiate with its subconscious brother.
The emotional snapshots that these dreams give me are probably arising out of a good number of unanswered questions in the mind that the subconscious of mine is not able to handle. These blocks have been a burden for quite some time for me. And they've more or less made me retire from a few things that I used to keep myself busy with in life. I am totally idle. I think I need some food for my brain, mind and body.
Showing posts with label Ramblings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ramblings. Show all posts
Monday, 18 April 2011
Thursday, 3 February 2011
His Name is D-E-E-P
I have always been interested in a good number of four letter words and have wondered a lot about how the combination of a paltry four English alphabets convey huge meanings. One can take 'Life' for instance, or 'Love' (for those who've had luck with girls), or the other obvious four letter word starting with 'F' that sprang up to your filthy mind at the very mention of "four-letter-words'. All of them have intense meaning and can be associated with deep emotions. So yea, cutting the tangent, yet again, I came across this blog and thought I can violate the creative commons license for writers, by giving a small and invisible credit to him towards the end of this writing.
Coming to content, I would like to introduce to you, this person who I have known for a really really long time now and in my opinion, is the most arrogant pig that has mingled with mankind since the days of Adam, Eve and their old, respective flesh and blood.
He, works in one of the numerous IT firms that litter the IT Expressway (better known as the OMR) in Chennai and to borrow from the inspiration itself, is one of those people on this profane thing called earth, who do not have something called "Life". The owner of this thought claims that half the people on earth have a life, while the rest work in IT. Going deeper on the introduction of this piece in existence, I would like to explain from four (again four :-)) different fronts...Personal, Professional, Financial and Spiritual.
Personal: He hails from the land of Cholas, viz..Tamil Nadu and belongs to the notorious and famous community of Tambrams. His Dad is a graduate working in the Automobile Industry, while his Mom is a home-maker. His brother is another speck in the large ocean of blighters who don't have a 'life'. Or, if I have to be exact, he works for another firm down the same IT Expressway. His passions are a conundrum to himself. But he has toiled and found some inclination towards Manchester United, PG Wodehouse, Sachin Tendulkar, South Indian Food and Movies(only the ones that are critically acclaimed).
Professional: He claims to be an engineer in Electronics and a Master degree holder in Chemistry, though no points would be awarded for guessing that he is nothing more than a nowt in those/related fields. His working philosophy is 'Work hard but not hard enough to become a donkey and in the process make a lot of money'. He is fascinated by almost anything at work since he does not have professional interests of his own. To rephrase that complex one, He is not any domain specific person (leave alone a domain specific expert), to call himself as such. He was one of "that poor lot", which graduated in the middle of the "global recession" and landed in places all and sundry shattering their dreams, interests, career ambitions et al in the process.
Financial: It would be to tamper with facts, if I went ahead and said he was a cunning professional who aspires to be a billionaire. But it would be exact, if I said, he wants to live like one of them. He spends most of his money on movies, apparels and fuel. He is by and large a pessimist and he likes that fraternity solely because he doesn't have to repay any loan to anyone from the fraternity. Not that he borrows a lot though :P. He doesn't read any book to enlighten him on "how to earn quick money" or "getting rich in no time" or some such thing. But he is on the lookout for someone who has achieved that end to give him a short sermon on those lines.
Spiritual: He is not an atheist, nor is he a staunch believer and of course he is not an agnostic. He is trying to find a suitable term to explain his position in those affairs. To give a brief description, he is not among those privileged few who can give an answer to the "Does God Exist" question. But he believes there is some super natural force exists at large, somewhere in the universe.
By design or by accident, I meet this guy day in and day out and I am not able to get away with that chore and in my personal opinion, people fitting his description should be "handled with care" for the good of mankind (womankind, to be more particular).
And if you have exhibited such a nerve as to have reached this point in the post, he wishes to say 'Thank You' and 'Hats Off'.
Introducing to avid readers of this space, 'Me' (Better late than never)
P.S: Though this post should be classified under the general heading of "Of No Use whatsoever", it would be of help one day, when someone might want literature references of this 'celebrity-to-be', for some kind of biographical work of thou!
P.P.S: Due credit to the author of this idea of a blog post
P.P.P.S: And to explain why I started talking about four letter words while drafting this one, I have introduced 'DEEP' (a four letter word) to one and all!!
Coming to content, I would like to introduce to you, this person who I have known for a really really long time now and in my opinion, is the most arrogant pig that has mingled with mankind since the days of Adam, Eve and their old, respective flesh and blood.
He, works in one of the numerous IT firms that litter the IT Expressway (better known as the OMR) in Chennai and to borrow from the inspiration itself, is one of those people on this profane thing called earth, who do not have something called "Life". The owner of this thought claims that half the people on earth have a life, while the rest work in IT. Going deeper on the introduction of this piece in existence, I would like to explain from four (again four :-)) different fronts...Personal, Professional, Financial and Spiritual.
Personal: He hails from the land of Cholas, viz..Tamil Nadu and belongs to the notorious and famous community of Tambrams. His Dad is a graduate working in the Automobile Industry, while his Mom is a home-maker. His brother is another speck in the large ocean of blighters who don't have a 'life'. Or, if I have to be exact, he works for another firm down the same IT Expressway. His passions are a conundrum to himself. But he has toiled and found some inclination towards Manchester United, PG Wodehouse, Sachin Tendulkar, South Indian Food and Movies(only the ones that are critically acclaimed).
Professional: He claims to be an engineer in Electronics and a Master degree holder in Chemistry, though no points would be awarded for guessing that he is nothing more than a nowt in those/related fields. His working philosophy is 'Work hard but not hard enough to become a donkey and in the process make a lot of money'. He is fascinated by almost anything at work since he does not have professional interests of his own. To rephrase that complex one, He is not any domain specific person (leave alone a domain specific expert), to call himself as such. He was one of "that poor lot", which graduated in the middle of the "global recession" and landed in places all and sundry shattering their dreams, interests, career ambitions et al in the process.
Financial: It would be to tamper with facts, if I went ahead and said he was a cunning professional who aspires to be a billionaire. But it would be exact, if I said, he wants to live like one of them. He spends most of his money on movies, apparels and fuel. He is by and large a pessimist and he likes that fraternity solely because he doesn't have to repay any loan to anyone from the fraternity. Not that he borrows a lot though :P. He doesn't read any book to enlighten him on "how to earn quick money" or "getting rich in no time" or some such thing. But he is on the lookout for someone who has achieved that end to give him a short sermon on those lines.
Spiritual: He is not an atheist, nor is he a staunch believer and of course he is not an agnostic. He is trying to find a suitable term to explain his position in those affairs. To give a brief description, he is not among those privileged few who can give an answer to the "Does God Exist" question. But he believes there is some super natural force exists at large, somewhere in the universe.
By design or by accident, I meet this guy day in and day out and I am not able to get away with that chore and in my personal opinion, people fitting his description should be "handled with care" for the good of mankind (womankind, to be more particular).
And if you have exhibited such a nerve as to have reached this point in the post, he wishes to say 'Thank You' and 'Hats Off'.
Introducing to avid readers of this space, 'Me' (Better late than never)
P.S: Though this post should be classified under the general heading of "Of No Use whatsoever", it would be of help one day, when someone might want literature references of this 'celebrity-to-be', for some kind of biographical work of thou!
P.P.S: Due credit to the author of this idea of a blog post
P.P.P.S: And to explain why I started talking about four letter words while drafting this one, I have introduced 'DEEP' (a four letter word) to one and all!!
Friday, 6 August 2010
Ipdi than irukkanum nu sollala...Ipdi irundha nalla irukkum nu solren....
Continued from part 1......
Ila, Anbu, Shri, Arul....All wazz well....It was a really joyful experience for all the four in each other's company. Hyderabad was turning out to be a nice outing for the four till Arul and Shrikanth had a nasty blow with their job taking a sudden twist. Life became tough. They had a top level management change suddenly. The change was for no good and Arul, Shri were not able to be their own self. Police vela avangaluku torture aga aramichiduchi (Their policeman job started taking a toll on them). They could not be the ilankandru's (young saplings) they used to be. They started looking for a change.
They wanted to move out of Nizam's city which was no longer peaceful with them. Anbu and Ila were trying to clear government examinations for their promotions at the same time. The four tigers started looking out for missions elsewhere. By this time Shri had taken an important decision in his life. He decided to put a full stop to his endless extravagances with Swathi. This figure (the case in point) started showing her true colors. Tea kadai chaais got promoted to coffee day outings. "Leaning on bike under a dysfunctional lamp post and chatting to glory" affairs improved into long bike rides. With petrol fares raised every full moon day in this country, these developments were not easy to bear with. Shri chose to run a long distance gilfosica so as to cut down on expenses.
Arul and Shri started going out on the roads with the IVVTP (Ilam valibargalin Velai thedum padalam) motto...Ila followed suit. He was bored of the same assignment day in and day out (mosquito smashing and seat warming). Ila found a new assignment which looked promising in the 'filling of purse' matters. Anbuchelvan was tired of those promotion exams in which he could not get even half of the pass mark. So, Anbu followed Ila and jumped into the FoJHB(Fraternity of Job Hunting Bachelors).
Nothing drastic till here. The thing that has been hyped up to such a level in these two posts came when "Late a vandhalum latest aa vandha" Anbu got his new assignment outside Hyderabad. There came a point in time when the Tamil Tigers Eelam had to disintegrate. Alas, Anbu was moving out of the team. He was moving out of the team that made him look formidable. He was moving out of Hyderabad. Yes, now we have the climax.
Climax started like this : Anbu treating all and sundry in Hyderabad who were friends/friends' friends/mere acquaintances. As is the case with treats given by bachelors, the OH content started increasing. An interesting thing about these treats which are replete with OH content is that 'emosanal disucusans' start becoming a common feature. The team started feeling the after effects of Anbu's loss already. In general, a widely accepted opinion is that a team that looks like "Ila, Anbu, Arul and Shri" is formidable. But come to a team with Ila, Arul, Shri sans Anbu..Fail...It is no good whatsoever. The young saplings started getting weaker. But all was not over. The climax had a twist. When the rest of the team had just learnt to digest the fact that they would be one man less, they were struck by another massive blow. Politics played by Shri's immediate boss resulted in Shri being transferred to "thanni illa kaadu" (waterless forest). Shri was moved to another department. He was on his way to Chennai.
A team with a high potential had disintegrated. Now they were not just one tiger less but two tigers less. Anbu and Shri are in Waterless Forest (luckily the same waterless forest viz. Chennai). But that was not any respite. As I had told earlier, a team that looks like "Ila and Arul only" is not even close to formidable. In fact, grapevine suggests that Arul could also be on his way to some waterless forest very soon. That would make our lone fighting tiger Ila battle it single handedly.
Now, coming to why I chose that title.... I ain't saying the team should be separated. It would have been good if they had not disintegrated.
THE END....
How Ila will manage to survive, does not fall into the scope of this story. And the script for that one is in progress.
The Cast: (As Promised)
Pradeep Sekhar C as Anbuchelvan
Praveen Kumar D as Ilamaran
Manigandan Parthasarathi as Arul
Thiagarajan Ravishankar as Shrikanth.
Story, Screenplay, Direction : Pradeep Sekhar C
Stunts: Manigandan Parthasarathi
Visual Effects: Pradeep Sekhar C
Comedy Tracks : Thiagarajan Ravishankar and Praveen Kumar D
A "I am Kannan, Bachelor, Monthly 20 thousand salary" production.........
Ila, Anbu, Shri, Arul....All wazz well....It was a really joyful experience for all the four in each other's company. Hyderabad was turning out to be a nice outing for the four till Arul and Shrikanth had a nasty blow with their job taking a sudden twist. Life became tough. They had a top level management change suddenly. The change was for no good and Arul, Shri were not able to be their own self. Police vela avangaluku torture aga aramichiduchi (Their policeman job started taking a toll on them). They could not be the ilankandru's (young saplings) they used to be. They started looking for a change.
They wanted to move out of Nizam's city which was no longer peaceful with them. Anbu and Ila were trying to clear government examinations for their promotions at the same time. The four tigers started looking out for missions elsewhere. By this time Shri had taken an important decision in his life. He decided to put a full stop to his endless extravagances with Swathi. This figure (the case in point) started showing her true colors. Tea kadai chaais got promoted to coffee day outings. "Leaning on bike under a dysfunctional lamp post and chatting to glory" affairs improved into long bike rides. With petrol fares raised every full moon day in this country, these developments were not easy to bear with. Shri chose to run a long distance gilfosica so as to cut down on expenses.
Arul and Shri started going out on the roads with the IVVTP (Ilam valibargalin Velai thedum padalam) motto...Ila followed suit. He was bored of the same assignment day in and day out (mosquito smashing and seat warming). Ila found a new assignment which looked promising in the 'filling of purse' matters. Anbuchelvan was tired of those promotion exams in which he could not get even half of the pass mark. So, Anbu followed Ila and jumped into the FoJHB(Fraternity of Job Hunting Bachelors).
Nothing drastic till here. The thing that has been hyped up to such a level in these two posts came when "Late a vandhalum latest aa vandha" Anbu got his new assignment outside Hyderabad. There came a point in time when the Tamil Tigers Eelam had to disintegrate. Alas, Anbu was moving out of the team. He was moving out of the team that made him look formidable. He was moving out of Hyderabad. Yes, now we have the climax.
Climax started like this : Anbu treating all and sundry in Hyderabad who were friends/friends' friends/mere acquaintances. As is the case with treats given by bachelors, the OH content started increasing. An interesting thing about these treats which are replete with OH content is that 'emosanal disucusans' start becoming a common feature. The team started feeling the after effects of Anbu's loss already. In general, a widely accepted opinion is that a team that looks like "Ila, Anbu, Arul and Shri" is formidable. But come to a team with Ila, Arul, Shri sans Anbu..Fail...It is no good whatsoever. The young saplings started getting weaker. But all was not over. The climax had a twist. When the rest of the team had just learnt to digest the fact that they would be one man less, they were struck by another massive blow. Politics played by Shri's immediate boss resulted in Shri being transferred to "thanni illa kaadu" (waterless forest). Shri was moved to another department. He was on his way to Chennai.
A team with a high potential had disintegrated. Now they were not just one tiger less but two tigers less. Anbu and Shri are in Waterless Forest (luckily the same waterless forest viz. Chennai). But that was not any respite. As I had told earlier, a team that looks like "Ila and Arul only" is not even close to formidable. In fact, grapevine suggests that Arul could also be on his way to some waterless forest very soon. That would make our lone fighting tiger Ila battle it single handedly.
Now, coming to why I chose that title.... I ain't saying the team should be separated. It would have been good if they had not disintegrated.
THE END....
How Ila will manage to survive, does not fall into the scope of this story. And the script for that one is in progress.
The Cast: (As Promised)
Pradeep Sekhar C as Anbuchelvan
Praveen Kumar D as Ilamaran
Manigandan Parthasarathi as Arul
Thiagarajan Ravishankar as Shrikanth.
Story, Screenplay, Direction : Pradeep Sekhar C
Stunts: Manigandan Parthasarathi
Visual Effects: Pradeep Sekhar C
Comedy Tracks : Thiagarajan Ravishankar and Praveen Kumar D
A "I am Kannan, Bachelor, Monthly 20 thousand salary" production.........
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