Monday, 26 April 2010

Do I really know what I need in life?

This is a thought that has been spinning my head for quite some time now. Me and my close circle of friends (read: my girl friend) discuss a lot over this topic and have been cribbing over how we want to change the typical IT lifestyle that we currently have. We have clearly realized that our goals in life are quite far from what we are doing right now. As in most cases of human predicaments, we talk a lot about it but haven't been able to get a concrete step taken in the right direction.

Let's consider my daily schedule. My Monday starts like a scene from the movie rush hour, where i realize that I have a stupid meeting to attend at 10 AM (wee hours of Monday I would call that) and this aforementioned realization usually happens around the time frame of 9:25 AM or so. After making it to the meeting at least 10 minutes late, I extend my nap in the conference room only to be awakened by periodic gurgles from the organizer sitting next to me. After a lot of deliberation and almost nil participation, I get out of the room for a cup of tea to stimulate my grey matter. The day goes by with a couple of fights with the disastrously slow computer which is my lone companion for the day. After a few hours of #including and ClassA-extends-ClassB-ing, I get out of the shit hole like a tired pugilist who has fought 5 rounds only to lose it all during the final stages. It would be like deceiving my readers if I said the time of the day when my exit from office happens marks the end of the day. To put facts straight i should rephrase that sentence to read "End of the Night".

If weekdays are so boring and pass me like a turbulent storm, weekends are worse. I get up fairly early in the morning(read: 11 am) and spend a substantial amount of time thinking what I should do over the weekend. With that thought doing all the calculations in my mind, the clock decides to tick something like 1 pm or 2 pm and there's a call from my gastro-intestinal tract to save it from dying of hunger. After dealing with things and managing to call off that hunger strike, English Premier League/Indian Premier League or some such league demands an attendance and I sit glued to my TV set for what I think is close to 2 or 3 hours. But in fact, the time I would have spent on that ordeal is much more.... which in turn means that it is time for the next meal so as to avoid another turbulent attack from my digestive faculties. With a ditto repeat of the same itinerary on Sunday, I face the rocket-speed-weekend-that's-close-to-an-end phenomenon. With nothing much that can be done about it, I go back to bed ruing my 2 wasteful days only to wake up for a repeat telecast in the next week.

I am not any soothsayer or fortune predictor. But I am pretty confident that most IT folks are stuck with the same/similar kind of schedule in their daily life.

On one such Sunday, that has been well described above, I happened to read a book by Paulo Coelho where he talks about what one does in life and how a winner is determined by the essence of his presence (excuse me for the rhyme) in this universe. I wake up the next morning to welcome another dreadful Monday and I realize that one thing has changed. I wake up a completely new man and realize i have a drastic change in attitude and outlook. That situation demands some explanation. I agree. Here it goes. The change that has been mentioned above is that I start to think "If I really know what I need in life". I know that is not a change per se. But as our experienced ancestors have repeatedly said, thoughts lead to actions and all that sort of a thing, It is always a good sign in the right direction if we start thinking about challenging the status quo that rules over us. But that thought took me nowhere which is an unfortunate thing and I ended up understanding the fact that I just simply exist in this world and occupy a corner of it like other stones, rocks and trees do.Period. I am sure a good number of IT folks who have managed to make it to this point of the long and boring passage will resonate on the same plane apropos the thoughts I have shared.

But the sad part is I am looking for someone to show me the way to correct this awfully boring lifestyle and I have not met anyone who can show some light at the end of the tunnel in that respect. Any thoughts?

P.S: Ok I have been tortured by an abysmal young blot who wants a mention in this post. Where I said: "I have not met anyone who can show some light at the end of the tunnel", I should have said "I have met someone(This Idiot) who could not show any light at the end of any tunnel even after hours and hours of gyan and free advice he gave me."


Hari said...

Bang on when you say that IT folks lead drab lives. My work schedule is the same (give or take an hour on either side).

As it happens there are very few people doing what they really want, put it down to a meagre percentage of the working population. They're probably a very lucky set.

Thing is its darn risky to just abandon what you're doing and take a plunge in the direction you want to. For instance, I'd always wanted to be a sports journalist. After 10th I thought I might probably do a bit of freelancing during college and then take it further from there, maybe work part time for The Hindu/Express, something like that. But BITS changed things. Am on a totally different career path now. Now if by some outside chance, I get an opportunity to write for a mag, I don't think I'll take it up, it's simply not worth the risk. Yet there are others like me who might be not as conservative and give it a shot.

I guess it all comes down to whether you're willing to risk a sedentary, well-paying job for what you really want to do. And of course, you should also know what you want :)

Having said that, I also know people who have no personal career interests, yet they're pretty happy doing what they do, seeing the colour of money every month. I envy them, because I think it is rather difficult to like everything you do. From that angle, the best is to not have any specific interest in mind at all, doing what you do everyday and go to sleep peacefully at night. Basically, zen-like existence.

Pradeep Sekhar said...


Yea, Tend to agree on most/all of your points. I would like to point out just one thing. The word "Risk" in a puritan sense should be considered as having a relative connotation. When your Dad is filthy rich and you can happily spend a grand or two on let's say a pair of socks or a pack of biscuits for terriers, the word goes missing from your dictionary.Risk edukardh Rusk sapadra mari aidum. On the other hand, when your two pence(monthly salary) is a thing that supports the family in any way, that word looks ominous and threatening.

As a result, the luxury of taking a risk is a restricted phenomenon and I wish I had it with me right now. In which case, I would quit my current job and start writing about the Eyjaffjallajokull eruption or Lalit Modi's income per hour or some such stochastic thing. :-)

raghu said...

we are on the same boat and any of my words would just add to the cliche...

go thru this link–-filmy-style/

praveen said...

someone has already pointed the right way to take. he went by the name of buddha.

Pradeep Sekhar said...

Thanks Man! I should change my reading preferences may be! and switch to Zen writing and Buddhist scriptures! :-)

praveen said...

not needed. everything can be summarized in one word : desire. but desire is a hard bitch to lose.

praveen said...

But Zen and Buddhist writings would definitely be better than the tripe of paulo coelho. :D

Pradeep Sekhar said...

So true!!